Nigeria Turns 52 – Celebration? A Personal Letter To All Nigerians


English: Political map of the 36 States of Nig...

English: Political map of the 36 States of Nigeria (English) Deutsch: politische Karte Nigerias (Englisch) (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

This October, Nigeria, a country in West Africa which used to be one of the greatest Nations in Africa,  now a sorry state of what it was in 1960, marks its 52 years of independence from the Europeans.

Since the beginning of this month, all we here is Celebration, Celebration, what a folly, what a disgrace.  There is absolutely nothing to celebrate as far as I am concerned.

Will you celebrate a failed and still failing son, daughter, family, or business? NO.

Rather if you so much as care, you will offer the person(s) the truth. All this celebrating or celebration idea is nonsense and a waste of money.

 

We need to say it as it is when the blood of youths, children etc. are being shed on a daily basis, destinies cut short without any remorse and people die  or killed as if no-one gave birth to them.

A country where majority are so desensitized to the truth, and it’s corruption from the top down and down up.

What exactly is Nigeria or Nigerians celebrating;  is it the failed state and governance or the tapped resources in delta state that runs out unchecked slowly wringing the life out of those who should benefit from it, or the pollution that’s been going on for years without any checks or accountability,  or the educational system that has been grounded to  a halt churning out graduates that can’t find a job or a decent means of living or the health care system that milks the life out of its people, or maybe all the politicians who suddenly found out how to be millionaires overnight while masses go a begging.

What are we celebrating please, am very much interested.

Let’s we forget:

“Children are the world’s most valuable resource and its best hope for the future” “Character works hand in hand with success”;

“Unless man is committed to the belief that all mankind are his brothers, then he labors in vain and hypocritically in the vineyard of equality”;

“It is poverty to decide or allow a child to die so that one may live as one wish”;

“Freedom lies in being bold”;

“Once you say or decide to settle for mediocre that is what you become in life”

“The people who get on in this world are the people who get up and look for the circumstances they want and if they can’t find them, make them”.

 

The day we all sing from the same tune is the day when our country Nigeria, will turn the corner. I hope we all stop covering this cancer because it’s a sign the country is going nowhere, Man is formed and molded by it’s thoughts, actions or inactions.

 

Oh, let’s keep praying for Nigeria o, others say passively!!!

Oh Yes, let us pray but do not forget that Nigerian’s problem is not an act of war or from the hand of God; it is plainly a self-inflicted problem. If the prodigal son did not reason enough and trace his steps back into his father’s  house, he would have rot in the slum he choose for himself.

 

Aside from prayers, there is what is called, “Personal Responsibility” towards a functioning and successful government or country; and that is the responsibility of every single Nigerian.

 

That is what keeps a country like Japan within the top league despite the deadly effects of two atomic bombs, the lasting effects on their citizens health, the damaged environment to mention a fee, Japan did not remain in their sorry state. Rather they consciously strive to come out of the ugliness of the war.
It only took one man (their educational minister at the time to shift the course of events). From kindergarten to University and beyond, every Japanese has culcated within their curriculum lessons on; Integrity, Leadership Skills, Truthfulness, Loyalty, Selflessness, Commitment and Every Good Virtue to mention a few, (for those of you critics, go research Japanese Educational System). By the time a young Japanese reaches the age of 10, he or she already has embedded in them commitment towards a good government, not just commitment to their purse/ bank account or family business as it is the case in Nigeria.

 

Malaysia is another beautiful country, very similar to Nigeria, Since independence in 1957, Malaysia has had one of the best economic records in Asia, with GDP growing an average 6.5% for almost 50 years. The economy has traditionally been fuelled by its natural resources, but is expanding in the sectors of science, tourism, commerce and medical tourism.

The country is multi-ethnic and multi-cultural, which plays a large role in politics. The government system is closely modelled on the Westminster parliamentary system and the legal system is based on English Common Law.

 

The day we (Nigerians) wake up to this reality of Personal Responsibility, Heaven will move.

People pray and the same people commit all sorts of atrocities as soon as they live their place of worship, do not be deceived God cannot be mocked. I hope my Nigerian friends read and understand this.

 

Positive change in Nigeria, must start with the change of mindset of every single Nigeria, it is not too late.

 

Rather than get bogged down with endless parties that will not reap a lasting harvest, let’s kindle this fire of Personal Responsibility towards a Successful, Reliable and Prosperous Nigeria and Nigerians..

 

Let me leave you with these thoughts/questions.

 

What are you willing to do for your country? When will you take the first positive step of change? We all have a responsibility to make a positive difference in our lifetime or are you just passing through?

I hope you will rise up to this challenge.

However,  regardless of what your thought is, please do me a BIG  favor, share this message with every born, free or bound Nigerians on your time-line.

“Until the great mass of the people shall be filled with the sense of responsibility for each other’s welfare, social justice can never be attained”.

THANK YOU.

 

Rebecca Bukola Ajibola

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Manners


Of all the things a parent can teach a child, manners rates very close to the top of the “must teach” list. Number one, when a child is taught, from the time he or she can talk, to say “thank you,” you are teaching that child thankfulness. The insertion of the word “please” in a request changes the child from a demanding person to one who accepts the fact that when they ask a favor or make a request, the parent has no automatic obligation to respond favorably to that request. Response to “please” is much better than the “get this for me” demand type of approach.

Psychiatrist Smiley Blanton says that roughly 80% of all of the counseling he does is the direct result of parents not having taught their children manners. He emphasizes that he is talking about more than table manners; he’s talking about the whole spectrum of deportment and civility. That’s significant because the record indicates that most top executives in any field of endeavor are courteous, thoughtful people. Example: One hundred seventy-five of the CEOs of the Fortune 500 companies are former Marines and 26 of our presidents served in the military. The military teaches respect and manners. I challenge you, when you encounter a former career military person who moved up in the ranks, you will be impressed with their old-fashioned courtesies, including, “Yes, Sir,” “Yes, Ma’am,” “Thank you,” “Please,” and other expressions of good civility and deportment. They are taught to serve before they earn the right to command.

Just in case you’re thinking, “But that’s old-fashioned and people don’t do those things any more,” of course, you’re right in both cases—which is the reason why the people who do take that approach stand out like beacons in the dark as they move to the top.

Think about it.

Be courteous yourself.

Teach your children to be courteous

Reference: Zig Ziglar

Present


The best way to predict your future is to create it and the best time to create it is right now – This
very moment! What does this mean for you?
Stop blaming the past or worrying about the future (.. Be anxious for nothing..  ) . The only time you really have is now, the present.
The past is gone, FOREVER! The future hasn’t happened yet. Today is a gift,
that’s why it’s called the PRESENT!
Cherish It! Embrace It! and Invest It!
Take advantage of it.

Why don’t women leave their abusers?


Grandville : Cent Proverbes

Grandville : Cent Proverbes (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

The fact is that many women do leave, and they risk their lives in doing so. A woman may leave an average of seven times—leaving and going back home—before she leaves for good. There are many reasons why a woman stays in an abusive relationship or returns home after leaving, but the primary motivation is fear.
Fear

The victim has every reason to be afraid. Many abusers threaten to take the children if she leaves—either by accusing her of being an incompetent parent and gaining custody or by kidnapping them. In extreme cases, he may kill them as the ultimate revenge against his wife.

She also fears for her own safety. She may get killed herself! A woman is at 75 percent greater risk of harm from her abuser when she leaves.1 One abuser threatened to kill his wife, saying, “If I can’t have you, nobody else will either.” In another incident the abuser disfigured his wife’s face with acid, proclaiming, “Now no one will ever want to look at you again.”
Guilt

Religious beliefs and guilt keep many women from leaving abusive situations. They fear the condescending and judgmental reactions of friends and family who believe she is responsible for breaking up the family by leaving. She may also fear offending God and her church family. Most women who have children try to protect them from the trauma of divorce by staying in an abusive marriage. They do not realize their children will suffer more long-lasting trauma by being in an abusive home than in a single-parent home. Women may not realize that leaving does not necessarily lead to divorce. In some cases, separation is the wake-up call that causes her husband to seek help.
Confusion

Confusion and “crazy making” keep many women off balance and unable to make rational decisions. One day he worships her and places her on a pedestal. The next day she doesn’t meet his expectations and falls from grace. The fall is a long one, and she can’t understand why he has changed from a loving, generous husband into a maniacal bully who delights in punishing her.
False Hope

False hope distorts a woman’s view of reality. Many women stay in an abusive home because they love their husbands and long to see their marriage succeed. They simply want the disrespect and violence to stop. She believes if she tries a little harder or waits a little longer, things will change. She believes him when he says the abuse will never happen again. Because he has been wounded in the past, she thinks he needs extra love and care, and she thinks that helping him become whole is her responsibility. Because she loves him, she denies the reality that he is capable of seriously hurting or killing her. False hope convinces her that she needs to protect her husband—even from himself.
Financial Instability

Financial dependence and fear of the unknown paralyze many women as they ponder how they will be able to support themselves and, in many cases, their children. Most women face financial, social, and emotional hardships when they leave, and they often find that assistance is limited or not available to them. Weak criminal justice systems offer no hope, and have failed victims again and again, causing women to be terrified of possibly losing custody of their children and become destitute financially. When a woman’s life is bound up in her family, she worries about continuing important relationships with stepchildren, grandchildren, in-laws, and friends. She believes her identity will be lost if she leaves.
Lack of Information

Ignorance of the facts and of the consequences of domestic violence causes women to view themselves as the problem rather than understanding the cause of violence is within the heart and mind of the abuser. They believe his violence is caused by temporary problems based on outside circumstances, such as stress at work. Having this mind-set, they believe that once the stress is relieved, the beatings will stop. In addition, some women are unaware that spousal abuse is spiritually and morally wrong.

(If you have been abused or in an abusive relationship, you dont have to suffer in silence feel free to contact us, there is help out there.)

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